"Logout" is the hardest button to click

Confession - I am addicted to facebook. Yes, I am. I have over 900 'friends' few ex's and of course my family. Sometimes my mom actually messages me on facebook asking me to come down and have dinner. You know you are addicted to facebook when you are chatting to your mom when she is just a hall away.

Like I mentioned I have my ex's on facebook too, why? Because I need to know what they are up to. I know, sick! But let me also add, I am the kind of person who does not hold grudges so I don't stare at their pictures mumbling curses under my breath. The worst I can do is look at their present girlfriend's picture and think 'ha! she is fatter than me' and then go to the gym to actually make that happen (like for a week).

I wonder how will I feel if my boyfriend (imaginary) dumped me on facebook without telling me. Obviously he is a jerk. I'll probably cry and get drunk and will be over it after a week or a month or a year depending on the relationship.

Here is this girl, this beautiful precious 23 year old Indian girl who killed herself because her jerk of a boyfriend updated his status something like this

"Feeling super cool today. Dumped my new ex-girlfriend. Happy Independence Day."

I don't think he realised repercussions of his actions. It's not the first time I am seeing a fb status like this. I see it everyday. Boys who are glad they dumped their girlfriend, girls who are convinced there is no love out there, or couples who announce their love everyday. 

A teacher I know (who actually passed this news to me) said "Are we not preparing our students to withstand the disappointments of life?" 

A very good question, a very important one actually and not much asked . For some reason our school system (especially Indian) deals mostly with academic prospects, that too if you feed them some money. But surely trigonometry cannot help you deal with the 'real' problems of life.  The one that keeps you awake at night. Trying to aim high we forget what ground are we standing on. A ground made up of family, friends, lovers and most importantly relationship with ourself. If that base is weak we cannot take off to the skies, can we? Who teaches us that? Sure we can take counselling. But how many people are brave enough to say 'I need help'. 

People shy away from talking on such matters and I understand why. That status made a girl suicide, it probably wouldn't have affected someone else so much. And who knows what other demons she was fighting inside. Maybe this break-up was the last strike.  Despite of her friends and family imagine how lonely she must have felt. Maybe she just needed to talk. If someone could have shared her pain, she would have been alive today, crying over some other man. 

But I am a believer in death, that it happens when it is suppose to happen. There are people who try to kill themselves and still survive because they just had to live a little more. Maybe her life is complete. 

We cannot bring back the dead, nor should we waste time in mourning over death, that only stops us and them from moving on. She already made her choice. But what can we do is think for people who are alive and in pain? 

I know it's a silly society we life in, where facebook can take a life, but never forget the people you add are real. They are more than just a profile. Next time your friend is crying over a guy you know is a jerk, talk to her, listen to her. Or you see your guy friend getting drunk over a girl, join him and make him see other things worth living for. Just hear them out. 

There are some of our friends who are so sensitive and a little naive, they need us. 

Issues like suicide can be scary, and no one really wants to talk about it, because sometimes it's just easy to talk about corruption and oil prices. 

Or you can just not add your boyfriend on facebook.  But that ain't happening.