Falling For Eternity

You fight to win

you hurt to win

why do you try to win

when you are born to lose it all

you lie to mend her heart

you cheat to break his heart

why do you do it all

when the heart has to stop beating someday

if we can all just sit beside ourself

stare back at the mirror within

in the whirlpool of world you'll see

there is nothing to win and lose

burn your worries into ashes

bury yourself and rise again

to fall for eternity

Winter

fly with the wind
like the autumn leaf
to the coldest place in you
cry the summers gone
the grass isnt green even on the other side

lying on the snow
making butterfly wings
but you cant fly still
laughing in your face
and struggling within

standing on the melting snow
wishing the time to stay still
found my peace with pain
not waiting for wonders
loving the numbness within

-Ruhi

Nothingness

eyes are open when closed
hidden truth they hold
dont open them tonight
swimming in the darkest night

silence shouts aloud
some secrets are never told
close your lips
sing to your soul

down and drown within myself
floating in the nothingness
freeze the fire
burn the snow
go beyond the mindless mind
breathe in vacuity

Akward Silence

Sweet akward silence
I can only hear
The music of our tangled breath
The song that our heart sings
Sweet nervous touches
A second without fear
The look that makes me melt away
Timid tender wishpers in my ear

Where do they go?
Lost in time
Freezed in my memories
And now we stand here
In an akward silence
Makes my heart tear
I can touch you still
But the love we shared is left far behind
We only have each other
Except, each other.

-Ruhi

Roses and Rains

Blackout for almost 8 hours.....
whats a girl to do in a lonely island
specially when she is stuck with her mom (rolls eyes)
...................it was a beautiful evening tho
the rain and the breeze.....if not anyone..roses in my garden looked very happy
so i took out my camera and froze the moment :P

the dew on leaves...ripples made by raindrops..shining pebbles..

my mom and i were talking about the time when Japs hit on Andaman Island
bloody cruel.............
some of the most gruesome way to give death
like they use to tell men to dig holes and then bury them alive
or torture by pulling nails out and then shooting the person and not just once.

Why, why would anyone do that...for a piece of land..just so that someone can clean your house and make your tea?
how can people get so cruel...and then they actually believe there is a devil, besides themselves
where was the self consciousness ????????????????????????
no matter how much i keep on mumbling 'how can they do this?'
its done.....to be honest i fear for the murderer more than the victim
those who die..move on..to a better place ...those who stay, live in guilt
no wonder people back from war suffered so many mental disorder.......
there are so many things i wonder about...how can people just take lives....what if it were you son or your father
those who kill is are just plain murderers and nothing more than that....and as gross as they are...i still don't believe in death sentences
Why would u fall down like them?......

Port Blair's system is sucking life out of me...from peon to officers everyone takes bribe...and for what ?? oils?? making roads??
I mean common people...your son runs his bike on the same road...at least make it for him

Sometimes i feel so helpless, that all i could do is just ramble on this blog which barely 3 people read and then go back to sleep.
DUH !!!

Anyway,there is still some beauty left on earth....if not in human, atleast in roses and rains.

The 13th zodiac sign

all my life..ahem..only 18 yers...i thought i was a sagittarian, but there were always few qualities that never matched. but surprise, surprise...im not really a sagittarian...i am OPHIUCHIAN. yes its the 13th zodiac sign.

Ophiuchus is better known as Serpentarius, the Serpent Holder. Ophiuchus is depicted as a man handling a serpent; his body dividing the large snake into two parts, giving way to the symbol used today as an Asclepius - the medical staff.
Ophiuchus relates to Asclepius, who learned the secrets of keeping death at bay after observing one serpent bringing another healing herbs. To prevent the entire human race from becoming immortal under Asclepius' care, Zeus killed him with a bolt of lightning, but later placed his image in the heavens to honor his good works.

Tarot card for Ophiuchus is the moon.


Zodiac order if 13th sign is counted-
Capricorn - Jan 20 to Feb 16
Aquarius - Feb 16 to Mar 11
Pisces - Mar 11 to Apr 18
Aries - Apr 18 to May 13
Taurus - May 13 to Jun 21
Gemini - Jun 21 to Jul 20
Cancer - Jul 20 to Aug 10
Leo - Aug 10 to Sep 16
Virgo - Sep 16 to Oct 30
Libra - Oct 30 to Nov 23
Scorpius - Nov 23 to Nov 29
Ophiuchus - Nov 29 to Dec 17
Sagittarius - Dec 17 to Jan 20

Some people say the element of 13th zodiac sign is fire...others say its water.

Anyway, here are few key words that relates to a OPHIUCHIAN-

* interpreter of dreams, vivid premonitions,
* attracts good luck and fruitful blessings,
* serpent holder, lofty ideals,
* a seeker of peace and harmony,
* doctor of medicine or science, natural-pathic,
* adds, increases, joins, or gathers together
* poetical, inventive nature, expanding qualities,
* seeks higher education and wisdom,
* overseer, supervisor of work,
* fame - either grand, or completely misunderstood,
* longevity, aspirations of healing the ills of man,
* architect, builder, reaches for the stars, figuratively and literally,
* tax assessor, or levys taxes,
* astrological talents, intuitive,
* large family indicated, but apt to be separated from them when young,
* the number twelve holds great significance,
* foresight and good fortune to benefit from hard times,
* has secret enemies in family or close associations,
* many jealous of this subject,
* notable father, apple of father's eye when young,
* high position in life expected [depending on aspects] highest fame and legend comes after death
* feelings of granular, wise, genius mentality,
* likes to wear clothing of vibrant colors, and plaids in particular,
* receives the favor of those in authority.

Amazingly these characterstics match more to me than of a sagittarian.
As for the signs that have moved up...you guys will need a serious attitude adjustment. 

source: wiki
http://astrolife.netfirms.com/scorpio&ophiuchus.htm
http://www.theskullwhisperers.com/id59.html
http://www.livescience.com/strangenews/your-astronomical-sign.html

Between the Spaces

an unheard scream
piercing this hollow night
my heart is numb

with every move of the clock
i am engulfed by lonliness
falling into the deepest sleep, with open eyes.

i want to fly again, breathe free
the ghost has chained me to the floor
in this haunted room of memories, i will breathe my last.

in a trance, i dance to the music of lucifer
till my feet bleeds i wont stop
like a crippled autumn leaf
i lie on the bed of this earth
listening to the funeral doom
till the wind takes me to some other world.

-Ruhi

Melancholy

oh sweet melancholy
you soothe my heart
from the bruised past
the days begone
you keep them alive
the bittersweet relation i have with you
any part of the world i go, i find you
nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
my pain is the song that calls you
the waves of my love have crashed on the rock
so i turn to you
your cold laugh will freeze my heart
through the ice i see my past
every tear of mine you treasured
should i call you cruel or kind?
someday soon ill be a fool again
in the darkness of the night ill sing to you
story of another beautiful mistake.
RUHI

Automatic Writing...not as supernatural as it sounds.

i just read my own blog....what crap...lol...no well..i noticed most of my works are sort of poem-like...they are almost similar abt light darkness mystery and love....almost everythin has a double meaning...

since most of my works excluding the social issues are automatic writting im not aware of it, and ofcourse its very random
if you dont know what automatic writing is here is a description-

Automatic writing is the process or production of writing material that proponents claim does not come from the conscious thoughts of the writer. Practitioners say that the writer's hand forms the message, with the person being unaware of what will be written. In some cases, it is done by people in a trance state. In others, the writer is aware (not in a trance) of their surroundings but not of the actions of their writing hand.

to simplify, i dunt know wat im writing unless i get out of it and read it later
i can sure say its me cause it sounds like me.

its nothing supernatural, anyone can do it with a bit of practise, but for some,it comes naturally, like me....it doesnt happen all the time, just when emotionally hyper, or very calm....after all nothin is supernatural...just natural, now a days too stressed to slip in my own fantasy world, guess m on a brk with the whole automatic writing stuff...but u never know...more like i never know...

i havent figured out more about it, so cant explain much...so yea dats it..

peace out...........mmmuuaahhhxxx.

Sex Education in India

Ok so just finished reading an article on times of India about the whole drama on 'no sex education in Indian schools' are you kidding me?
But why?...don't u want your kids to be save and protected?
Sex is a integral part of life no denying that, common that's how you are here ! What bothers me is sexual changes starts when a guy or girl is what 14 or even 13? lets be honest here folks, don't tell me the first time you blushed on listening to the word 'sex' was when you were 20, you ain't that dumb,or maybe you are slow. So if the urges starts from 13, which is what hmmm 8th grade..i guess...y start educating about sex in 12th grade, its like 'hey kid u know abcd, no worries lets revise?' . And whats it about having no sex before marriage?...if i get marry when i'm 30 i can only have sex after that, 30 yer old virgin???....fuck!! [no pun intended]
get a life, wake up....girls are doing it when they are 14 and 15....so start teaching them a year early, not how to have sex, they have porn for that, but how to protect yourself from disease and pregnancy, even the mental changes after that. Have a age limit if you ask me 16 or 17....you can put it 21..but they are going do it anyway, so lets be realistic. It takes time to get use to new things, but change is unavoidable.
Some freaking teachers said we stopped it cause guys jeered, of course they will it's only natural...what are you there for? Whack them on head they'll grow out of it. And about putting girls and boys in different rooms? you know they are going discuss it anyway?..Old days flashing back how excited guys and girls use to get as we reached to the chapter 'reproduction' in biology...
Sex is natural, so is sex education, so please open your narrow minds and do it for the sake of kids future.
Sex education is not a cultural topic, it's a matter of health.


[[[[[[PLEASE USE CONDOMS !!! USE DOTTED OR RIBBED FOR BETTER RESULTS ]]]]]]]