White is for healing

Here I lie
Waiting for you to open your eyes
Do you see me?
I could be invisible
Lying next to you makes me doubt my existence.

I have buried the ghost
but once it hears my longing
it will travel through the earth back to my heart

I once opened a door to watch the maple leaves fall on the floor
But as I walked my empty self to the graveyard
the snow had covered the leaves

White is for healing

Here I lie
Waiting for you to open your eyes
And when you did
I didn't see you any more
you are invisible
we are invisible.
Our existence is like the ghost
Like maple leaves buried under the snow. 

Aim, shoot and regret

Decisions, decisions.
Welcome to adulthood.
I am probably going to look back someday and laugh that I spent 24 hours obsessing about this one thing but right now I am in a battle.
When you are in the battlefield there is no past and no future. Only now. Right now.
Right now there are decisions to be made.
Which road do I pick? What kind of person will I be if I take on this journey? Am I even ready for it? I don't want to die in vain.
Everyone is in a frenzy to achieve something.
Can I get a moment please?
And can you make it last forever?
I am wounded and I cannot fight.
Forgive me for being a coward but I am not ready to die and I am not ready to heal.
Let me bleed this time.
Let it be forever.

Smell of Bodhi

Just before the dawn
Before the first ray of light hits my life
Shadows come alive
They whisper in my ears, begging me not to open my eyes
I am the daughter of the night
How can I betray the darkness?
The sun is my oblivion

Invisible line

I walk on an invisible line

Infinite possibilities with a blink of an eye

Roses have blossomed among the refuse

Hope and faith have survived.

Daydreamer

Tiny frame can only hold so many colours 

Without letting it drip out of the golden gates

I wanted to be the ocean, the moon, the night

I wanted to be God’s own design

Instead they put me in cage

Teased me every time I closed my eyes

Now I am soiled with time and space

I have been told to be happy when the sun shines

But I am the daughter of the moon and the night. 

Whims Of A Shy Girl

I stood at the corner of the stairways listening to people talking about random, unimportant. I wanted to go downstairs, I was hungry. But their voices made my legs freeze. I knew if I go down I’ll have to talk to them… greet them, and do all the formalities that I absolutely hate and never understand.

If I just went downstairs and make it to the kitchen without saying a word they’ll think I am rude and uninterested. The later I was but not rude, never intentionally.

I am standing still but my brain is racing, struggling. It tells me to move my feet and go downstairs, be polite and then go to the kitchen. Could such a simple thing be a dilemma? What was I afraid of? They don’t live to judge me, they don’t care. But it’s not about the judgment. I just want to be invisible. I want more space. I feel the air is full of their energy, their thoughts.

I can’t just stand in once place, it’s already been thirty minutes. I go to my room and check my face. I look presentable, that’s encouraging. I spend some more time pacing from the edge of the stairway to my room, still listening to their voices. I can’t be a prisoner in my own house. I repeat this in my head over and over again.

Maybe I should go back to my room and wait for them to leave. Next thing I know, I am making my way down the stairs with a smile on my face.  I greet them and they greet me back. It happened so quick, almost effortlessly. I reach the kitchen and breathe out in relief

It’s over...for now. 

Yours Truly

She loves me unconditionally that I know

She will come for me one day

From sickness she will comfort me

Or my health she will take away.

I will lay the bricks and share my blood

I will shout my name from mountain tops

And when I think I have seen enough

Her presence will show me things I have never seen

Her touch will ignite my worst fear

And her kiss will make me fall in love.

My lover don’t punish me with your abstruse moves

Send me a sign before we meet again?

And I shall being you flowers

Take you in my arms like I never let you go

Before we take off for another adventure

And you leave me again

For a moment we will embrace

Until life do us apart.

via Google images 

Touch of Fate

What happens to mysteries that never get solved?

They go back to live in closed drawers

Silently waiting for a seeker to pass by

Hoping that he could be a little more sly

Zealous and bursting with pride

Skilled in discovering the meaning of unspoked words  

But the fates of mysterious things are cruel

Long they wait to be unraveled

Only to be abandoned and forgotten.